Falling for the holidays

A few years ago I stood as one of the few residents in my neighbourhood who DIDN'T put up colourful Christmas lights. I didn't see the need considering how bright my house had become from the glare of the lights from my neighbours' homes on either side of my own.

Then little Bronwyn Who, who was no more than 2, looked up at me last year and asked "Where are our Christmas lights Daddy?"

By the end of the week I had not only purchased my own strands of Christmas lights but I found myself up on my roof giving my best impression of Clark Griswold in Christmas Vacation. Well I thought it was my best impression but little did I know then that the best was yet to come.

This past Monday was mild so I decided to suck up some Christmas courage and head to the roof once again. I untangled my lights, made sure each and every bulb would light up and then got the ladder out and headed to the roof.

It was all going so well. In no time I had cleared the eaves of a few remaining leaves and strung up the lights in record time. I stood up admiring my handy work. I was on top of the world! Then things went south.

Picture me sitting at the edge of my roof with my legs dangling down. My feet find the rungs of my ladder and I swing around and take my first step towards earth. Now picture the ladder shaking as the bottom of it loses its footing. One second I'm on a ladder, the next it's crashing to the ground. Gawd did it make a noise. Fortunately I didn't plummet to the driveway at precisely the same time. I was too busy hanging by one arm from my eaves trough. I would probably of hanged there all afternoon if the eave hadn't broken away from the roof causing me to fall.

DOWN...

DOWN...

DOWN I went. And as I fell it never dawned on me that I had a strand of lights caught in my jacket. As each light broke away from the eaves trough it made a CLICK, CLICK, CLICK, CLICK, CLICK sound.

Fortunately my ass broke my fall and I bounced up like I was on a trampoline with a strand of broken Christmas lights in my hand.

My neighbour Bud came running out and shouted, "Are you okay Ian?"

In my best Clark Griswold voice I replied, "Never better Bud, why do you ask?"

He shook his head and told me to call him if I needed help. Looking up I knew I wouldn't need help in the immediate future. What I would need though was a new strand of lights and a couple days recuperation for my bruised ego.

Merry Christmas everyone and for those who enjoy Christmas Vacation as much as I do here's an appropriate clip from the movie.

When cash was king

Last week the Bank of Canada released brand new $20 polymer bank notes to much fanfare. The bills sport a fancy design and pay respect to our war veterans depicting the Vimy Memorial in France on the back. The front depicts a picture of the Queen. The colour remains the same as the older $20 notes -- green.

 The bank notes are touted as being nearly impossible to counterfeit. On Friday night I got one from a bank machine. It immediately ended up in my 14-year-old daughter's wallet. She called it her allowance, I called it 'money for nothing' but that's a topic for another blog.

The $20 note is the third one to be upgraded, the first being the $100 note released last November followed by the $50 note released in March.

On Sunday my wife Heather dragged me out to Justice, a new kids' clothing store, to spend a few of these new bank notes. We had Christmas gifts to buy for my niece and she apparently loves Justice.

The store was buzzing with activity. Kids and parents were everywhere shopping for the brightly coloured clothes. It wreaked of 1985. I saw styles hanging on the racks that would have made Madonna, Frankie Goes to Hollywood and Cindy Lauper proud.

Heather and I got in line and waited. Twenty minutes later we were greeted by the young teen cashier. After asking us for our phone number and postal code she said, "Will you be paying for this by credit or debit?"

"Cash," Heather replied pulling out some of Canada's fancy new money. The girl looked confused.

"I can't take cash at this register, you'll have to wait for that register," she said pointing to her right.

"You've got to be kidding me. What business doesn't accept cash?" Heather said.

"I'm sorry, I can't take cash at this register," she replied.

Stunned we went to line No. 2. When we finally got to the other cashier she too asked us for our phone number and postal code.

"I'm not giving you that information," Heather said.

The teenager didn't know what to do. Apparently Heather was the first person she'd dealt with who refused to give up her personal information. These days we're so accustomed to answering those questions it seems unusual if a cashier doesn't ask them.

"This store has a lot to learn about customer service," Heather said.

"I apologize for the long wait," the girl said. She had no idea the wait was only part of the reason we were unhappy.

It was amazing how quickly our purchase was completed by not having to plug in so much personal information into Justice's computer system. The girl took our money and put it into her register, just like in the olden days, you remember those back in the 1980s?

I know money is used less and less these days as debit and credit cards have taken over. But being refused service for wanting to use cash caught me off guard. That was our first trip into Justice and given our experience it will probably be our last.

Wrong time for Christmas cheer

Given my enjoyment of everything Halloween, Nov. 1 is  a seasonal let down for me. It never slowly winds down over the course of a week like Christmas does. No, Halloween comes to an abrupt end and we're all forced to put our scary decorations away.

I always view Nov. 1 through 11 as a time of Remembrance. Giving one day to Remembrance on Nov. 11 doesn't cut it for me. Our war veterans and all those who died for Canada deserve better than a day. Eleven days of talking to my kids about our veterans, their sacrifices and everything we take for granted in our country is my way of remembering. It also helps my kids understand the importance of Remembrance.

When I hear Christmas music playing in stores prior to Remembrance Day I get annoyed. Halloween merchandise, in many cases, will still be on the shelves while Christmas songs clog up my air space. I hate that. In my mind no festive holiday music should be played in stores or on the radio until after Nov. 11.

Until this week I figured I was alone in my thoughts about this annoying music. But apparently there are more like-minded individuals out there who share my dislike of Christmas music being played so soon after Halloween. Shoppers Drug Mart has nixed the fa-la-la-la-la-las and pa-rum-pum-pum-pums until later in the month after getting feedback from customers on their Facebook page. Good on them.

There's lots of time after Nov. 11 to inundate the airwaves and our shopping malls with Christmas tunes. Personally I'd prefer not to hear anything festive until Dec. 1 but I'm a bit of a grinch.

Here's hoping other retailers follow suit and turn off the holiday cheer until mid-November.

For my own selfish reasons Nov. 1 to 11 should be a more sombre time, a time of reflection, a time of Remembrance, a time of thanks.